Dear Client:

So sorry.  Since I didn't trust you to pay for my tax preparation services, I deducted my fee (plus a little extra) from your refund.  Since my getting paid was more important than your refund, we have a little problem.  Your stimulus check is going to be delayed for awhile because I accidently ended up with your money.  You are going to get paid, but it could take awhile to get straightened out.  But the good news is, you could be the lucky recipient of an actual check with our president's name on it.   I'm sure that will help make up for the delay in your payment.

Sincerely,

Your Trusted Tax Preparer