"Why should she be penalized by being forced to itemize?"

Isn't that a good question to ask the non-cooperative Spouse? Or, perhaps, she is benefiting from them filing MFS, even though it seems not to her specific benefit on her filing?

Have you confirmed that is in their best interest, or do you have no control over the spouse's filing?

It just seems like a good question to ask her Congressman, otherwise. Because we can't confirm she is being penalized. If it was just her, she would not be married.