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It's Friday, or it could be Saturday if you read this tomorrow

IRonMaN
Level 15

Since tax season has just ended (well at least close to ended ----------- does it ever really end?), everybody could use a little break since it has been an exhausting year.  For those folks that have no sense of humor ------------- I can't believe you actually exist.  How can someone have no sense of humor?  Anyway, you can skip this post and go back to reading tax regs.

One Sunday morning, the Lutheran pastor noticed Ole standing in the foyer of the church staring up at a large plaque. It was covered with names and small American flags mounted on either side of it. The old Norwegian had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood beside Ole, and said quietly, 'Good morning Ole.'

'Good morning Pastor,' he replied, still focused on the plaque. 'Pastor, vat is dis?' The pastor said, 'Well, it's a memorial to all the men and women who died in the service. Soberly, they just stood together, staring at the large plaque.

Finally, Ole's voice, barely audible and trembling with fear
asked, 'Vich service, da 8:30 or da 10:45?

 

Ole was having eye trouble, so he went to see the optometrist. "Put this little gadget over your left eye, Ole," said the optometrist. "Now over the right eye, over the left eye. No, Ole, I said left eye. Now right . . . No Ole, your right eye!" Completely confused, Ole just looked at the optometrist. "Now, Ole," the optometrist continued, "just remember which is your left hand. OK, Ole, cover your right eye . . . No Ole, that's your left eye!" Finally in exasperation, the optometrist took a brown paper bag, cut a hole in it, put it over Ole's head, and moved the hole back and forth from the left eye to the right eye. "Now, Ole," asked the optometrist, "How is that?" "Vell, Doc, I guess it's all right," said Ole. "But I vas vishing I could have some wire rims like Sven."

 

 

Legal disclaimer - not responsible for repeat jokes.  I think I have read all Sven and Ole jokes at least 1,000 times, so I always have trouble remembering which ones I have posted in the past.

Extra bonus - no extra charge:

The judge had just awarded a divorce to Lena, who had charged non-support. He said to Ole, "I have decided to give your wife $400 a month for support." "Vell, dat's fine, Judge," said Ole. "And vunce in a while I'll try to chip in a few bucks myself."

 

ACME Taxes, Tattoos, Tires and Tasmanian Devils - one free devil with every return.
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2 Replies 2
abctax55
Level 15

Unless Jensen happens by, then it might be yesterday (or tomorrow?) considering where he is.

That reminds me, I need to check in on him.

And don't worry about repeating any jokes, I can't remember many of them until I get to the punchline anyway 🤣

Former Chump..oops..AllStar...I used to be a people person, then people ruined it


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IRonMaN
Level 15

I have worked out an agreement with Intuit that doubles my pay if I post jokes that aren't repeats 😂

ACME Taxes, Tattoos, Tires and Tasmanian Devils - one free devil with every return.